So Ravi sat, watching the little touristy noisy vessels going
pass him. One, more lit up than the other. It was that decorated time of the
year, when every little structure was sporting, their, little twinkling lights,
while every shop was screaming special deals on the festive bargains. There and
still not part of all this wear and tear, he watched detached, like an out of
body experience.
His phone rang, he ignored it for a few times. After seven such calls, he finally answered, "Yah, I’m ok. Sitting by the river front.... no I'm alone. Yah you can come......but don’t bring anyone along."
After a while Samuel joined him. He asked Ravi, "So u waiting for Godot too?" They both laughed.
Samuel then sent Ravi an enquiring look, Ravi shrugged and confessed he was feeling too transparent in that crowd. Samuel nodded and said he understood, "It’s quite a circus there! Don’t know what’s selling there.....artworks, or people. Ravi then began, "I don’t know what is more disturbing, the circus or the people who watch the circus. I mean, look at me; am i not to blame? Don’t I want a piece of that cake, that they are all in there, battling for.
I can logically say that I feel I don’t belong there. But did i not come here to be a part of this flesh trade. Yah Samuel, don’t look at me like that, just because you and I are not buying and selling ourselves doesn’t mean others are not. I mean did u see how Coral, was behaving. It corrupts the creative space and disrespects, her own artwork. Can she not see that it’s not necessary to stand there and lure people to her work.
I mean the process it’s so sacred. It’s me and my space with my thoughts and ability. What comes out thereafter is a result of that experience. Forget me, can anyone actually make real sense of that thereafter? No they can’t, no u can’t! So why am I expected to stand there as part of an extended display and answer those banal questions? If I showed them my wounds, would they” stressing, “tell me Samuel, would they feel the pain? No they won’t. However maybe just maybe, there will be one person, who just was walking passed and stopped, stared and felt the pang. Now just because she felt the pang do we have to force her to buy the work? Maybe she doesn’t want a reminder of the pain. Maybe she just connected for that fleeting second. Do i have to compel her to see that she needs a daily reminder of the pain..... I mean isn’t it repulsive this entire process? Come and see me somersault, clap and when you are done clapping, buy a figurine at the door shop that will constantly remind you of what a buffoon I am."
Ravi stops and Samuel sighs....... "Ravi, I know you think it’s impure, this entire process. However this is how the world functions. Life is a market, some will sell others will buy. You have to understand you are not selling yourself, but a remnant of an experience. Some will not actually, just appreciate, but also fathom the entire experience. And until that happens, your work has to be out there looking. You are not a spectator in the circus, you and I are the circus. Me for funding the talent I’m trying to uphold and show to the world, and you for the mirror you hold, hoping to find your reflection someday in it. Alas, once here in this market, all we will see, is the blood that bleeds and shadows of people that used to be. You and I are not above this bazaar. We are the bazaar." Ravi stares away in front and then slowly he resigns and rests his head on Samuel's shoulder. Samuels phone rings, "Hello! yes, its 2,40,000. Yes, I’m bringing him over. He will explain it, himself." Ravi smiles.They slowly get up to leave the river promenade.
His phone rang, he ignored it for a few times. After seven such calls, he finally answered, "Yah, I’m ok. Sitting by the river front.... no I'm alone. Yah you can come......but don’t bring anyone along."
After a while Samuel joined him. He asked Ravi, "So u waiting for Godot too?" They both laughed.
Samuel then sent Ravi an enquiring look, Ravi shrugged and confessed he was feeling too transparent in that crowd. Samuel nodded and said he understood, "It’s quite a circus there! Don’t know what’s selling there.....artworks, or people. Ravi then began, "I don’t know what is more disturbing, the circus or the people who watch the circus. I mean, look at me; am i not to blame? Don’t I want a piece of that cake, that they are all in there, battling for.
I can logically say that I feel I don’t belong there. But did i not come here to be a part of this flesh trade. Yah Samuel, don’t look at me like that, just because you and I are not buying and selling ourselves doesn’t mean others are not. I mean did u see how Coral, was behaving. It corrupts the creative space and disrespects, her own artwork. Can she not see that it’s not necessary to stand there and lure people to her work.
I mean the process it’s so sacred. It’s me and my space with my thoughts and ability. What comes out thereafter is a result of that experience. Forget me, can anyone actually make real sense of that thereafter? No they can’t, no u can’t! So why am I expected to stand there as part of an extended display and answer those banal questions? If I showed them my wounds, would they” stressing, “tell me Samuel, would they feel the pain? No they won’t. However maybe just maybe, there will be one person, who just was walking passed and stopped, stared and felt the pang. Now just because she felt the pang do we have to force her to buy the work? Maybe she doesn’t want a reminder of the pain. Maybe she just connected for that fleeting second. Do i have to compel her to see that she needs a daily reminder of the pain..... I mean isn’t it repulsive this entire process? Come and see me somersault, clap and when you are done clapping, buy a figurine at the door shop that will constantly remind you of what a buffoon I am."
Ravi stops and Samuel sighs....... "Ravi, I know you think it’s impure, this entire process. However this is how the world functions. Life is a market, some will sell others will buy. You have to understand you are not selling yourself, but a remnant of an experience. Some will not actually, just appreciate, but also fathom the entire experience. And until that happens, your work has to be out there looking. You are not a spectator in the circus, you and I are the circus. Me for funding the talent I’m trying to uphold and show to the world, and you for the mirror you hold, hoping to find your reflection someday in it. Alas, once here in this market, all we will see, is the blood that bleeds and shadows of people that used to be. You and I are not above this bazaar. We are the bazaar." Ravi stares away in front and then slowly he resigns and rests his head on Samuel's shoulder. Samuels phone rings, "Hello! yes, its 2,40,000. Yes, I’m bringing him over. He will explain it, himself." Ravi smiles.They slowly get up to leave the river promenade.
